Chinglish, the butt of many expat bloggers in China. It’s all good and well to have a good old ‘tee hee he’ about Chinese words transmogrified into English but have you looked in your own country’s backyard lately?
Well I did recently and came across this doozy. Seriously, whoever wrote, approved, painted, and then hung this sign needs a good hard look at themselves in Sydney, Australia:
Today’s post doesn’t really have much to do about living in Shanghai but rather some music available on Chinese video site, YouKu.com, which I’m surprised to see.
I’m not much for flag-waving about where a band is from but if you are looking for something a bit different here are some Australian bands which are pretty good and might be worth a listen. I wouldn’t say these are my cream picks from Australia but just a taste of recent music over the past 10 years and worthy of adding to a playlist.
While out and about on Saturday we dropped into the Expat Show which was on all last weekend in Shanghai. What we didn’t know was that it was an expat-only affair – only some Chinese allowed.
The very idea of an expat show seems to suggest someone wants to sell their wares at a premium to the foreigners in the city – and it didn’t disappoint. Financial advisers at every turn, expensive holiday deals to flog, overpriced wines to swill, and hospitals offering premium health care and breast enlargements. Also out in force was just about every English-based media platform looking to boost their subscriptions and mingle with previously mentioned services about advertising.
Yes, that as much we expected.
What we didn’t expect was the story that only expats were allowed into the venue. The story, from a reliable source, says people on the door were screening entrants based on ethnicity and some Chinese citizens were being refused entry. This caused some issue with locals who were trying to enter – and rightly so. Expats who have been to the same event in previous years say this has happened before.
According to a sponsor the event organisers were screening people to make sure they had a “connection to the show” and weren’t just there to get the freebies or harvest the useless brochures for recycling. Essentially, people like us who were clearly there to seize as much free schwag as possible.
The difference? I’m a whitey. Whiteys are allowed to be sponges.
Another attendee allegedly saw a woman argue with a hostess on the door because she could not prove with a passport that she wasn’t actually a Chinese citizen but an expat. Meanwhile, this attendee saw (white) friends using fake aliases and weren’t even checked for ID.
To me this just doesn’t sit right at all. It screams of racial segregation and the bad old days of colonialism. But, as others have pointed out, maybe I over-reacting because the exhibitors want to make sure the ‘right’ audience get their freebies? Some exhibitors may get angry, for example, if all their pamphlets are being tossed straight to the city’s recyclers.
As a reader, I’ll let you decide what is ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ in China. It seems moral indicators are a constantly swaying pendulum for many expats.
Ahh Friday’s. What would they be without a good monkey story?
About a month ago I was sipping, as elegantly as one can at 10pm, on a margarita at Cantina Agave on Fumin Lu (which is the best Mexican in town by the way) when a monkey came up on the bench and started begging. It’s fairly common to see people beg around western restaurants and bars in town but we were surprised by the monkey. It was the first monkey we’d seen in China, let alone Shanghai.
Unfortunately, the monkey was on a leash and was trained to beg – not far behind the monkey was a toothless character thinking we’d give him some money for his show of animal cruelty. When we said no, the monkey shot off and went to go to the next table. Instead of begging the monkey went straight for a loose handbag on the table. Luckily the woman who owned the bag was firm and shooed off the monkey like an old hand the owner disappeared fast after one of the women who worked there started chasing him down Changle Lu.
What did I do? Not spill one drop of the margarita, of course.
Which brings me to the point of today’s post: Don’t show fear to the monkey. According to a report in the London Metro we were extremely lucky the monkey in Shanghai didn’t get loco on us like one did recently in Chengdu:
A 60-year-old woman,Zhou Juchang, was pushed off a cliff by a monkey. She made the claim after winding up at the bottom of a seven-metre rockface, fracturing her hip and breaking three ribs.
Now she’s suing her travel agent, who organised her trip into China’s Chengdu Wildlife Park.
The monkey allegedly flew into a rage when the woman refused to hand over the bag of monkey food which her tour guide recommended she buy.
A spokesman for the park said the woman’s mistake was showing fear.
Anyway, if you are after Mexican in Shanghai I do highly recommend Cantina Agave. Relatively cheap Mexican food, good tequila, nice owners, and expensive jugs of margaritas. It’s located in the French Concession at 291 Fumin Lu, near Changle Lu.
One of the things that I always get embarrassed by in Shanghai is the snotty, whingey, annoying expats who act like pretentious tossers because “things aren’t that way back home”. Just the other week I was in a restaurant where a chino-clad, high-panted, middle-aged guy was yelling so much at the staff that his face was beetroot red.
The problem, of course, was that there wasn’t enough parmesan cheese on his salad. Instead of simply asking for some he proceeded to throw a tantrum and said something racist about all Chinese not knowing how to make food. The whole episode went something like this:
Tosser Expat: “What is this? There is no parmesan on my blah blah salad!”
Waitress: “Oh what salad did you have?”
Tosser Expat: “The blah blah salad! It says it comes with parmesan cheese. Where is the parmesan cheese?”
Waitress: “Let me get you a new one”
Tosser Expat: “I don’t want a new one I just want the parmesan. Do you have parmesan?”
Waitress: “Okay I’ll take it and put parmesan on it”
Tosser Expat (now yelling): “DO YOU HAVE PARMESAN? JUST BRING OUT THE PARMESAN!”
Waitress: “But I need to take it to the kitchen…”
Tosser Expat (red-faced, yelling more): “NO. I WANT TO SEE THE PARMESAN BEFORE YOU PUT IT ON THE SALAD. BRING IT OUT HERE. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? CAN I SPEAK TO YOUR BOSS?”
At about this point the waitress was obviously pissed off and went to get the boss. More yelling happened and eventually the guy got his parmesan. But seriously, all over a bit of extra cheese?
I sometimes question the usefulness of such expats who fail to see that they live a relatively privileged life compared to so many uncomplaining, hard-working people – who in comparison – should have much more to complain about.
Should Microsoft wait for software piracy to be policed or should the company look for new avenues of revenue during the lifecycle of Windows 7 in China?
Last week I penned an editorial piece for ZDNet Australia with the argument on why Microsoft should give their next operating system, Windows 7, away for free in China. It’s not as crazy as it sounds if you consider their online position.
But, you’re going to have to read it over here.
I’m back visiting people in Australia at the moment and came across an old vinyl I left at my parents place many, many moons ago:
It’s a fact that Australia – not China – could be the most populated country on the planet if all the expats, backpackers, and nomads actually lived in their own country.
Damn Australiens!
Last weekend we headed over to what is being hyped as the next cool area of Shanghai: Cool Docks. Located at the southern end of the bund at 479 Zhongshan Nan Road, near Fuxing Road, one could easily drive past and not really notice the new area – its right next to a whole heap of construction next to the Expo site.
While the area itself seems to be still under development it had a rather empty feel to it when we went late on Sunday afternoon. Hardly anybody was around, the restaurants had nobody in them, and none of the shops were anything to write home about. Maybe this is a night spot? I guess what really ticked me off was the fake graffiti wall with an Avril “Hey, hey, you, you I can be your girlfriend” Lavigne logo on it.(see picture below)
Anyway, given that we were hungry and it didn’t seem like much else was around so we stepped into the Indian restaurant, Kebabs on the Grille, which had a 140RMB buffet special. We didn’t go out searching for Indian, because we’ve been sorely disappointed by anything resembling butter chicken in Shanghai so far, but this was by far the best we’ve had in town.
While the place could do with a once over the food was great. They offer northern Indian fare with curries, salads, and desert all part of the buffet menu. It also included a glass of wine and bottomless drinks. The staff were super friendly and had a family-run restaurant feel to it, which is always a good sign.
During our stay I noticed a driver from Mealbay picked up a delivery so it seems like they offer home delivery through that service. I’m not sure if we’ll be trekking back to Cool Docks anytime soon – it kinda sucked – but if we get the taste for Indian again we’ll definitely be back.
What: Kebabs on the Grille
Where: The Cool Docks,
479 Zhongshan Nan Lu,
near Fuxing Dong Lu
中山南路479号，
近复兴东路
Phone: 6152 6567
Avril Lavigne graffiti logo at Cool Docks, Shanghai
Well actually, I don’t. But, I recently found a t-shirt in Shanghai with a print on it I instantly recognised from a place I used to live near in Sydney:
The painting is famous if you’re ever in King Street, Newtown. It uses the words of Martin Luther King Jr. painted on the Aboriginal flag.
Where to buy musical instruments in Shanghai
One of the great joys of being a consumer in Shanghai are the areas dedicated to certain goods. There are tech malls, bathroom fittings malls, camera malls, fabric malls, fake stuff malls, and so on. For the musically minded Shanghai doesn’t disappoint either. There are a few music streets and areas but one of the largest can be found on Jinling Rd (Jinling Xi Lu). Whether it is rock and roll, electronic, classical, or even traditional Chinese instruments this street pretty much has it all.
From observations the prices were pretty good, especially for acoustic guitars – I saw one for 250RMB. Being a really bad drummer at home I found a lot of the kits did look and sound a bit plastic though. However, I’m not sure having a full kit is really something the neighbours in Shanghai would appreciate (or maybe it would be a welcome relief from all the construction going on for the Expo). There are electronic kits from all the major brands though.
For guitarists, bassists, and even cow bellers there’s enough stuff here to arm your band. What you might miss compared to many shops in the west is the ‘vintage’ area. It seems this market isn’t catered for too well here (that I can see).
It’s also a treasure to find some traditional Chinese instruments. Personally, I like the Sanxian(三弦) but there is just about every instrument to buy there.
What: A whole street full of music shops
Where: East Jinling Road (it goes for blocks) – see picture for address in Chinese